everything you'll never have

Welcome to something you'll never understand
To something so wild, it will burn the heart out of you

You may never know how you got here
Tumbling in a whirlwind of happenstance 
But this is everything you'll never have and more

You came, thinking to splash in a puddle
I still remember the look on your face when you fell down a well instead 

It's almost a shame, for you to be so blind
But the we both know the truth would sear your soul so badly, 
You'd never see again.

The confoundingly simple truth. 

p.s.

I woke up before everyone this morning and made this flower wreath. Then I went and woke up my little sister to wear it. This is approximately five seconds after she woke up.  

My Earliest Memories Tag

Lydia S. did this tag and left it open for anyone who wanted to do it. And I wanted to. So I did. XD

Me.

1. What is your earliest memory? 
Back when we still lived in Colorado, I remember waking up from a nap (remember naps?) when I was.... Oh, somewhere between two and five... and I was the only one in the house, except Mom. The sun was just setting and the entire trailer park was painted orange. All the older kids had gone over to the park and left me at home. Well, not to be deterred from playing before bed, I found a basketball and then figured out how to dribble it. So I practiced dribbling a basketball in the orange trailer park. 

2. What is your earliest memory of a birthday?
I have no idea how old I was turning (three? five? *shrug*), but our family went camping at the beach in Oregon. (I think we were just visiting from Colorado, but we might have moved at that point, not sure) and we were gone during my birthday. So mom made this blueberry cake and I ate it in my highchair. And it is, to this day, the best thing I have ever tasted.

3. What is your earliest memory of a food?
See above answer. XD Oh, unless it was stealing Cori's candy... I'm not sure which came first... Ah well, one time when I was about 4, Cori (sister) got this mug full of candy for her birthday. And oh boy, was I jealous. You must understand, our birthdays are just two days apart and we usually celebrate them together. But do I get an entire mug full of candy? No, I don't. And it wasn't just any candy either, but those amazing strawberry, jelly filled things. So naturally, I wait for Cori and everyone else to be somewhere else and I take what was either the entire thing or a rather large handful and crawl under a bed and eat them. And they were almost delicious enough to make up for how much trouble I was in.

This pretty sums up our relationship at that point. 

4. What is your earliest memory of a gathering?
I can remember our family Christmas's pretty far back, but the most vivid is one Thanksgiving when we ran out of places at the table at our grandparents'. So Cori and sat on a bench and shared a plate. And for some reason, that was just the best thing. 


5. What is your earliest memory of family?
Mm.  Well, I remember staying with my grandma when I was four, while my youngest sister, Autumn was born. I don't think that's the earliest memory I have, but I saw quite a lot of my relatives then, between staying with them, and at the hospital. 


6. What is your favorite memory?
Favorite.... Well, my two younger siblings, Zack and Autumn and I used to play this game called Foxes. It was played on the trampoline and was basically this great big imagination game. Between living in trees, evading hunters and repeatedly rescuing Autumn from poachers, it was a game that made for some very fond memories. Though the cows make for some good too. 

The calf was lonely, so I kept it company. 

7. What is your earliest memory of a gift?
OH OH OH

So, back in Colorado again. It was a party for my third birthday and someone (probably Mom) got me Bear from The Bear in the Big Blue House. Like this? It was this 12 inch tall figure of Bear that danced and talked and sang. Oh man, I loved that thing. That was the same birthday party when Hannah Joy gave me this ziplock back full of these enormous gumballs. And SHE DIDN'T GET ANY FOR CORI HAHAHAHAHAHA Cori almost couldn't believe someone had gotten me candy, and none for her. XD

SO happy.

8. What is your earliest memory of an embarrassment?
Oh boy. Well, I don't get embarrassed very easily and certainly didn't when I was little. I mean, just look at this picture:

Nope. Not very embarrassed.

9. What is your earliest memory of when you were scared?
Well, again, I don't remember getting scared very much, but when I did, it was ridiculously irrational. When I was about eight, my uncle just down the road from us, used to have a llama who was supposed to guard the goats. And for some unknown reason, he always scared me just a little. But the time that was truly terrifying was when us three older girls  were out in the goat field with our goats, and the llama was out there too. We finished with whatever we had been doing and started heading back to the barn and then the llama goes NUTS. He pins his ears back and starts running. (I don't think he was even running towards us). Well, I don't really remember how I got there, but the last thing I remember is hanging from a fence post brace from my arms and legs, refusing to move.
Poor Cocoa. 


10. What is your earliest memory of a camp? 
I have been to an actual camp once, but that was when I was 14. But before that, we did go to our church's camp out. We actually still go to those and they're still super fun. Bikes, a creek, Frisbee, volleyball, campfires, etc. 


11. How young were you when you received Christ? (optional)
I am not sure. I would guess when I was 5 or so. But being raised in a Christian home and all, it kinda feels as though He's always been around. 


Man, I had a good childhood. XD 

Annnnddd I am going to be good and actually tag some people. 

Mary Shelley Reid

Jordy

Cally

Lady Em

And Noor

And duh, if you want to do this, go ahead. :P 

xx

Life.

Hello, all. I haven't posted in some time, so here is what I have been doing instead:

We hosted a Christmas Ball! It was essentially a Christmas event, in honor of me and Cori's birthdays, which are three days apart.

(Most of these pictures were taken on a phone, so they're rather blurry.)

Daniel and Sarah, doing Virginia Reel

Korobushka

This, folks, is a photographic example of exactly how much harder I laugh at things than anyone else.

I even got this guy who went to community college with me to come! And since he and Cameron are both huge geeks, he even had someone to hang out with, besides me. 

Virginia Reel

Hannah Joy came to visit us and helped with putting up our Christmas tree, among other things.

Having the tall person put our Captain America star up. 

I also had a birthday.

At the restaurant we went out to.

Yes, Autumn is wearing a top hat. 

Yup. 17 years old now.



Insect update!


Mom got me three Glorious Scarab beetle larvae for my birthday.

And my Hercules beetles have grown quite a bit and should be pupating within the next few months.

Hercules

Mom also gave me cocoons for both Polyphemus moths and Promethea moths, which should emerge sometime between May and June. All very exciting. 

Other than that, I survived my first term at community college and even got all A's. *pats self on back*  We have been swamped with orders for blacksmithing forges from our home business, what with people buying them as Christmas gifts. And the first calf was born this morning! A healthy, 80 lb heifer. 

Also, Christmas shopping, music-ing and CrossFit. 

SO. That's my life.

p.s

Christmas music+Owl City= this

Lady Gargoyle

My sister, the gargoyle has made herself a blog. She only has her art posted there right now, but I think she will write some things as well. http://gargoylia.blogspot.com/

Insects and Fairs

Klickitat River

        This weekend was by far the most fun I've had in a lonnngggg time. I was invited by Arthur Dunn to go on an butterfly collecting trip with him, one of his naturalists friends and a lepidopterist, Caitlin LaBar on Saturday. Needless to say, I was a bit excited. 

        

There were lots of butterflies, as well as some very cheeky crickets Arthur and I took the time to catch. I didn't take many pictures, but here are a few

Swallowtails 

Pale Swallowtail

We also saw a rattlesnake facing off with a squirrel. The squirrel was antagonizing the rattler and he seemed to have had about enough of the squirrel and was leaving. 

The rattlesnake. See it?

Caitlin, Arthur and Marianne

A deer that died sometime in the winter. No beetles underneath, sadly.

So yeah. Best day evah.

THEN on Sunday, my family had a booth at the Mother Earth News fair for the blacksmithing forges we make. While nowhere near as much fun as Saturday was, it was still an enjoyable day.

Cori blacksmithing

Lady Em from The Life and Times of Emily C. 

Yours truly, sunburning.

Cori, giving a lesson to this year's guy-who-stays-and-watches-literally-the-whole-time. There always is one.

Mom

Also, I  home with two chicks. Because they're adorable. Their names are John Carter and Jay, even though they're both females. Autumn bought two as well.

Jay climbed up there on the way home,

And then was joined by everyone else. I was so tired and sunburned at this point.

Autumn's face here about sums up how all of us were feeling by the end of the day. 

That's what I've been up to. What about you? 

Dun dun dun

Aren't brains funny things?

I was talking with my siblings the other day about how their different brains look on the inside. This isn't an uncommon conversation here, but this time all five of us were involved.

And we all have radically different kinds of heads.

For example, my oldest sister Cassie and my brother Zack apparently have 3D brains. With gears and wires and blueprints floating around. Cassie says that it would be easiest to explain if she had a projector to show me with. 

 Cassie

Zack would like this. 

Sister Cori just has this big swirling mass of colors and impressions, with no words at all. You know that yellow/pink and black cloud thing you see when you close your eyes? I imagine it a lot like that and she says that's pretty accurate. 

Cori

Mine is words and conversations, with the occasional picture from a memory. And completely linear. I could articulate everything in my head in a steady stream of nonsense. I have about three voices, one is my regular voice and the other two are just made up.

This is the best I could find for me, mostly because I haven't been able to sleep much lately because of  thinking too much. 

Youngest sister Autumn says her brain looks like a heart. Which isn't at all surprising with her emotional orientation. Everything has emotional implication for her.

Autumn agrees, I'm sure.

SOOOO this post did originally have a point but I got lost finding nice Pinterest quotes. XD

What does your mind look like? I'm sure there are more than four or five different sorts of  minds out there.

a song 

What what

So my mom wrote me a poem. I didn't even know she could do that.

A poem for Becca:

The Hen

Under my feathers

I hid an egg

Lovely creamy secret

Warm with the becoming

So satisfying and mine

but Oh!

It changed--

I fluffed

and kept it hid

There.

Oh! While I was dozing

Something Bright

Grew

And pecked

And there it is

With shining eyes

And impertinent beak

Here's a random, blurry picture of me and a chicken. 

Playing Dress-up

 
                   This isn't the sort of thing I'm going to be blogging about on a regular basis, but I think this event was unusual enough to justify it. If you don't think so, then ignore this post. XD

                   So, we attended a Disney themed homeschooler prom held by a family from art school (MSOA), held at what was essentially a mansion/castle.

Here.

I really wasn't sure I wanted to go when we first heard about it. Actually, I was quite sure I DIDN'T want to go. Because what good, self respecting homeschooler wants to have to admit to having gone to prom?? However, Mom bought a ticket for me anyway, and she and my sisters convinced me to go. Besides, my two friends were going to be there. So I agreed. Even wore a pink dress.

My cousin/friend Brenna. Putting a scarf over my face. 

 I am so very proud of my face in this picture.

                                      That extra girl is April, she rode with us.

Though Cori's is pretty good in this one. 

My lovely Cameron. She's one of my favorites. 

Me and two of my sisters. 

         Apparently, proms are mostly about dressing up and taking pictures. Not sure why. *shrug*
       

Sister Cori. Blacksmith extraordinaire.

Sister Cassie. Seamstress extraordinaire.

Mom made me wash. My. Feet. AND paint my toenails. AND wear heels, ghastly things. 

                  And in the end, I'm actually glad I went.  It was something worth doing once in your life.