Moonlight Insomnia

I cannot sleep when the moon is bright,

I simply can't, try as I might.

Silver light streams across my face,

And slips through the leaves, turning to lace.

Down the windowsill, and spilling on the floor,

It saunters into my head, banging open the door.

You, them, her, It and we,

Him's and I's are all set free.

Bright eyes and moonlight are dangerous things,

They'll keep you awake like the song someone sings.

And I have to get up, you know that I do.

The moon should keep to herself, all these visions of you.

But there's not much to be done, I just squeeze my eyes tight,

To wait it all out and for morning light. 

p.s.

'ear 'ear

My whole body shook with terror.
I sucked in a breath, to appease my gasping knees.
Or tried to.
But my lungs weren't taking oxygen at that time.
Which was a shame, because my heart was already off and racing.
Desperately I tried again, but it was too late.
Too late.

~

I was ready. I was braced.

The world was going to end, everything was going black.

I saw you then. I saw... You.

But the world was still so wonderfully green.

Isn't that all wrong?

But, oh.

Oh right.

p.s. 
I totally found a piece of wood that looks like an ear. How cool is that?

And It Was Lovely

x

Walk

   Walk. Stop running from care.
In fact, sit down and crawl for a bit.
    I'm lying here with you.
My knees are bleeding too, our wounds are twin expressions of integrity.
    So hold my hand and stop for a bit.
Walk. For once, slow down.
    Say hello and smile at me with your eyes.
Or better yet, smile with me,
    And we'll brighten the day of every passerby.
Walk. Walk with me.

xx

To You

Dear Cally,
Hi. Sweet is the best word for you and I like that you both know that and kinda don't. I'm not very good at composing good blogger-girl comments, so may I just say: I like your blogs posts. XD Someday I will send you that book and when I do, there will be chocolate with it that to make up for my tardiness. What's your favorite kind?
~Love,
     Becca 

Dear Adelaide,
Hi. I feel kinda sneaky putting this here, since you're not a follower, so I'm kinda like a ninja. You have gotten me utterly hooked on The Hunts.  And it is terribly frustrating because they don't have nearly enough songs for me to find and listen to. Other than that, it's fun to hear about you through the grapevine.
~Love,
     Becca 


Dear Lady Em,
Hiya! I still feel both a bit proud and bad for the April Fools prank I pulled, but hey, had to be done. I beat my old weight for the backsquat at CrossFit this evening, and tied with Cori. If I were to add a new color to my wardrobe, one that I don't already wear often, what should it be?
~Love,
     Becca


Dear Cameron,
Please forgive me. Really.
~Love,
    Becca 


Dear Embers,
Hi. You're just plain old neat. I always admire those who can wholeheartedly and unabashedly love what they love, and still be rational human beings. Doctor Who, etc. So good job. I don't always comment on your blog when perhaps I should, but I promise I read them all and enjoy them. What's a song I should listen to?
~Love,
    Becca 


Dear Jordy,
So I was at the store the other day and Mom was taking forever shopping for plants or something, so my sisters and I were in the section with paper and things. And I saw these stationary cards with foxes on them, in a style that I very much thought you would approve of. On a completely different note, when's your birthday?
~Love,
      Becca


Dear Everyone Else,
You're important too, I simply didn't have as much to say to you here as these others. *grins*
~Love,
     Becca 


p.s.
Been gone for a while. Trying to come back.

p.p.s.
See my new header? Autumn painted that. 

i can't actually take pictures

Have you ever tried to take pictures from muleback? It's much more difficult than you might think.

p.s.

Yup, I put a fern on Myrtle's face. She was thoroughly confused. 

everything you'll never have

Welcome to something you'll never understand
To something so wild, it will burn the heart out of you

You may never know how you got here
Tumbling in a whirlwind of happenstance 
But this is everything you'll never have and more

You came, thinking to splash in a puddle
I still remember the look on your face when you fell down a well instead 

It's almost a shame, for you to be so blind
But the we both know the truth would sear your soul so badly, 
You'd never see again.

The confoundingly simple truth. 

p.s.

I woke up before everyone this morning and made this flower wreath. Then I went and woke up my little sister to wear it. This is approximately five seconds after she woke up.  

i don't care

back in the summertime

"i let a piece of my heart slip

i'm good at that, you know."

but that doesn't mean i have to like it.
and it doesn't mean i have to care.
you're all smiles
all kindness

so don't you dare tell me i'm charming.
don't you dare tell me my voice gives you chills.
i don't want to hear it.
 i don't care.

this is a plea.
this is me begging.
they're just words.

but somehow,
they still mean more than you'll ever

know.  

p.s.
This post was inspired by Cally's over here. Go check her out. 

Also this, in honor of being a copycat.

My Earliest Memories Tag

Lydia S. did this tag and left it open for anyone who wanted to do it. And I wanted to. So I did. XD

Me.

1. What is your earliest memory? 
Back when we still lived in Colorado, I remember waking up from a nap (remember naps?) when I was.... Oh, somewhere between two and five... and I was the only one in the house, except Mom. The sun was just setting and the entire trailer park was painted orange. All the older kids had gone over to the park and left me at home. Well, not to be deterred from playing before bed, I found a basketball and then figured out how to dribble it. So I practiced dribbling a basketball in the orange trailer park. 

2. What is your earliest memory of a birthday?
I have no idea how old I was turning (three? five? *shrug*), but our family went camping at the beach in Oregon. (I think we were just visiting from Colorado, but we might have moved at that point, not sure) and we were gone during my birthday. So mom made this blueberry cake and I ate it in my highchair. And it is, to this day, the best thing I have ever tasted.

3. What is your earliest memory of a food?
See above answer. XD Oh, unless it was stealing Cori's candy... I'm not sure which came first... Ah well, one time when I was about 4, Cori (sister) got this mug full of candy for her birthday. And oh boy, was I jealous. You must understand, our birthdays are just two days apart and we usually celebrate them together. But do I get an entire mug full of candy? No, I don't. And it wasn't just any candy either, but those amazing strawberry, jelly filled things. So naturally, I wait for Cori and everyone else to be somewhere else and I take what was either the entire thing or a rather large handful and crawl under a bed and eat them. And they were almost delicious enough to make up for how much trouble I was in.

This pretty sums up our relationship at that point. 

4. What is your earliest memory of a gathering?
I can remember our family Christmas's pretty far back, but the most vivid is one Thanksgiving when we ran out of places at the table at our grandparents'. So Cori and sat on a bench and shared a plate. And for some reason, that was just the best thing. 


5. What is your earliest memory of family?
Mm.  Well, I remember staying with my grandma when I was four, while my youngest sister, Autumn was born. I don't think that's the earliest memory I have, but I saw quite a lot of my relatives then, between staying with them, and at the hospital. 


6. What is your favorite memory?
Favorite.... Well, my two younger siblings, Zack and Autumn and I used to play this game called Foxes. It was played on the trampoline and was basically this great big imagination game. Between living in trees, evading hunters and repeatedly rescuing Autumn from poachers, it was a game that made for some very fond memories. Though the cows make for some good too. 

The calf was lonely, so I kept it company. 

7. What is your earliest memory of a gift?
OH OH OH

So, back in Colorado again. It was a party for my third birthday and someone (probably Mom) got me Bear from The Bear in the Big Blue House. Like this? It was this 12 inch tall figure of Bear that danced and talked and sang. Oh man, I loved that thing. That was the same birthday party when Hannah Joy gave me this ziplock back full of these enormous gumballs. And SHE DIDN'T GET ANY FOR CORI HAHAHAHAHAHA Cori almost couldn't believe someone had gotten me candy, and none for her. XD

SO happy.

8. What is your earliest memory of an embarrassment?
Oh boy. Well, I don't get embarrassed very easily and certainly didn't when I was little. I mean, just look at this picture:

Nope. Not very embarrassed.

9. What is your earliest memory of when you were scared?
Well, again, I don't remember getting scared very much, but when I did, it was ridiculously irrational. When I was about eight, my uncle just down the road from us, used to have a llama who was supposed to guard the goats. And for some unknown reason, he always scared me just a little. But the time that was truly terrifying was when us three older girls  were out in the goat field with our goats, and the llama was out there too. We finished with whatever we had been doing and started heading back to the barn and then the llama goes NUTS. He pins his ears back and starts running. (I don't think he was even running towards us). Well, I don't really remember how I got there, but the last thing I remember is hanging from a fence post brace from my arms and legs, refusing to move.
Poor Cocoa. 


10. What is your earliest memory of a camp? 
I have been to an actual camp once, but that was when I was 14. But before that, we did go to our church's camp out. We actually still go to those and they're still super fun. Bikes, a creek, Frisbee, volleyball, campfires, etc. 


11. How young were you when you received Christ? (optional)
I am not sure. I would guess when I was 5 or so. But being raised in a Christian home and all, it kinda feels as though He's always been around. 


Man, I had a good childhood. XD 

Annnnddd I am going to be good and actually tag some people. 

Mary Shelley Reid

Jordy

Cally

Lady Em

And Noor

And duh, if you want to do this, go ahead. :P 

xx

The used up light

So rich in hue

The dawn so bright

The fragile dew

The heavy shadow 

Of evening cold

The last hurrah 

In vibrant gold

The first grey shaft

In silver fey

With light quick steps

Draws night away. 

                        -Lady Gargoyle

                        p.s.

Life.

Hello, all. I haven't posted in some time, so here is what I have been doing instead:

We hosted a Christmas Ball! It was essentially a Christmas event, in honor of me and Cori's birthdays, which are three days apart.

(Most of these pictures were taken on a phone, so they're rather blurry.)

Daniel and Sarah, doing Virginia Reel

Korobushka

This, folks, is a photographic example of exactly how much harder I laugh at things than anyone else.

I even got this guy who went to community college with me to come! And since he and Cameron are both huge geeks, he even had someone to hang out with, besides me. 

Virginia Reel

Hannah Joy came to visit us and helped with putting up our Christmas tree, among other things.

Having the tall person put our Captain America star up. 

I also had a birthday.

At the restaurant we went out to.

Yes, Autumn is wearing a top hat. 

Yup. 17 years old now.



Insect update!


Mom got me three Glorious Scarab beetle larvae for my birthday.

And my Hercules beetles have grown quite a bit and should be pupating within the next few months.

Hercules

Mom also gave me cocoons for both Polyphemus moths and Promethea moths, which should emerge sometime between May and June. All very exciting. 

Other than that, I survived my first term at community college and even got all A's. *pats self on back*  We have been swamped with orders for blacksmithing forges from our home business, what with people buying them as Christmas gifts. And the first calf was born this morning! A healthy, 80 lb heifer. 

Also, Christmas shopping, music-ing and CrossFit. 

SO. That's my life.

p.s

Christmas music+Owl City= this

Taaagggeeedddddddd

I have been tagged. *waggles eyebrows*

Here are the rules:
• Link back to the blogger who tagged you
• Take some pictures of your favorite thing in your room
• Explain why that certain thing is so special to you
• Tag five other bloggers

SO the person who both made the tag and tagged me, is Embers, of A Dragon's Whisper. Go follow her, etc. 

This was a much harder choice than I anticipated. Turns out, I don't have things in my room, unless I really like them. I went with Bog, who is not technically a "thing", but he's my favorite. So ha. XD

 Here he is, in all his glory. Bog wasn't feeling very photogenic, but I did manage to get a few nice-ish pictures of him.

 Isn't he darling?

NOW, the reason he is so special to me is because he's not only a cockroach, but my nicest cockroach. See, I have several others, but he's the nicest and doesn't try to skitter off when you hold him. Plus, he's adorable and fascinating, both excellent reasons for being a favorite of anyone. XD


I taagggggg...............,

Hannah Joy

  Cally

Jordy

Cassie 

Annddddd The Piano Girl!

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some dancing in the rain to do.

When she saw their stories as colorful strands, she couldn't help but tug on them.

She gently coaxed the silver out, to discover it knotted tightly to the black.

And the pink was tainted with a sickly green, from being wound so tight about it.

But one color was always intact, and that was the desperate strand of gold,

hidden at the center of things.

Not always long, or bright, but always to be found.

She worked some strange magic she didn't understand and unraveled them down to their souls, 
till all that remained was a raw, tangled pile of colorful string.

But what to do with them then, she hasn't yet figured out. 

*dances*